~BLOWING A GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY~

I'm tilted....I'm pissed, upset....Something I really despise is being lied to, betrayed, deceived....
I feel that if someone is a good friend, and you care about one another, both parties should strive for honesty, want to be honest....and I am feeling letdown and troubled that someone near & dear to me felt he had to deceive me....He had asked my opinion on some upcoming decisions he needed to make and we talked on the fone for nearly 3 hours, going over all the fine points, details, pros and cons of his decision....he said he really wanted my input and was totally up in the air about things so as we continued the discussion, lengthy and convoluted, I began to feel that he was pulling away or hiding something but I carried on as if nothing were amiss....when we finally seemed to be nearing the end of the coversation, he sheepishly said he needed to tell me something....and proceeded to tell me that he had ALREADY MADE THE DECISION, had called the appropriate parties and that it was resolved!!!! I asked him WHY THE HELL ARE YOU JUST TELLING ME THIS NOW????!!!??? WHAT the hell did you want from me then? Why the hell did we just deliberate this for the last 3 hours??? Why weren't you UP FRONT with me?? Now, he is fully aware that I feel he should go ahead with the plan he had originally made....let me eXplain here: My friend was going to go to a health retreat....he had just spent a few weeks there about a month or so ago and wanted to return since he needs more time there to work on some major health issues....he has chronic health problems due to  farm chemicals he was exposed to years ago. So he completed his time at the health retreat and had no money to continue the stay, therefore, he spoke with the administration about gaining employment in their facility in exchange for room & board, all the program benefits, organic foods, nutritional supplements  and everything he'd received as a paying resident....and he'd only need to work half days. He had fully agreed to everything, however, he told them he'd be in touch with regard to the time slot & scheduling. They would only need him until fall, so he would need to get going soon. In the meantime, he developed a problem and although I won't go into detail about it, it is something he can take care of in just a few days....yet, as always, he sabotages his successes by backing out of the health retreat agreement to deal with this problem. Now, in a few days the problem will have been remedied, yet he will, for no good reason, have screwed himself out of the health retreat and all it's benefits....and for what? He NEEDS to build up his health....could not afford to....has this perfect opportunity HANDED to him and he shuts the door on it. He still has 2 weeks til he had to GO to the retreat....and so in the meantime, he will be doing nothing....and he spends most of his time at home, "thinking', he says....and his thinking is obsessive and is not constructive, he dwells in the past and he has very little sense of time passing....until suddenly YEARS have gone by and he continues to bemoan his plight, wishing for what was and never gaining ground toward beginning anew for he will never listen to anyone or follow the advice of good friends, counselours or therapists. He, instead, chooses to wallow in his own misery....He claims that he is too "weak" to follow any of the plans set for him by the retreat or his doctors....so after arriving home from the retreat, where he had quit smoking, quit sugar, dairy, meat, junk....had exercised, followed a rigorous structure, learned some cooking and people skills and was detoxifying his body, he returns home and immediately begins smoking, eating junk food, staying up all night and threw his immune system into a tailspin....so now he is back where he started....which is why it pisses me off that he refuses to return, when it will cost him NOTHING and all because he has a distorted mindset, believing he needs a rest after solving his current problem....when what he TRULY needs is the RETREAT so he may begin boosting his immunity....He knows this yet he cannot be reasoned with....I only want it FOR HIM, I have no ulterior motive, no hidden reasons....I have known him for 25 or so years and I know him WELL....I only want the best for him because I care...yet he chooses to blow that off, sabotage himself, deceive me, his so-called best buddy....Hence, I am pissed, hurt, confused....
I saw great results beginning, his mind was clearer, his energy levels increased, his attitude much more optimistic, his anxiety reduced....his immunity boosted, his communication improved....and by going back to the retreat to work, acquiring room & board & program benefits, he would not only continue to improve, but chances were good it may also be possible to migrate to another of the retreats' branches in a southern state, to work, enjoy the same benefits and winter there. He has screwed himself out of a golden opportunity. He bitches that life sux and he never gets a break and 'why me', etcetera....yet here lies the gateway toward golden health and happiness, opening onto even greater horizons....
I just do not understand why he has done this.
P.S. I know he will read this and all the arguments and protestations he will utter....He will wonder how seriously I take the "problem" he had to deal with: My answer would be that I take it very seriously, I understand the ramifications and in's and out's, however, the problem was NO REASON not to go to the retreat. None whatsoever. It, in fact, is all the MORE reason to GO to the retreat!
He will argue that I, myself, cannot seem to quit smoking either, as though that would bear any relevance, which it would not. I am not the one who was offered this golden opportunity, I did not ask his help or advice, I am not at stake here...He is. His life and future health. Summer is short. I just do not want him to pass life by....opportunity usually does not knock twice, he needs to grab this opportunity. I feel that he is not seeing the forest for the trees....Perhaps this blog will lay it all out in an understandable, coherent way that will appeal to his sensibilities. All too often, people just wait for something to happen instead if making it happen. Here was, maybe still is, a perfectly golden opportunity to pull himself up and make something great happen....time goes by, we age, become infirm....die. Why live with regrets? God wants us to work toward achievements and to be the best we can be....to approach each endeavour with all thy might....not to fold and wimp out. As we meet each new challenge, we grow as people, we grow in strength, we grow spiritually, mentally, emotionally....
My friend has eXpressed to me that he has a multitude of regrets about his life and feels hopeless....here is a chance to begin anew, to build new memories and forge new strengths....to reject it will bring upon him a new burden of regrets he can dwell on forever...or not....
YOU DO STILL HAVE A CHOICE MY FRIEND BUT YOU MUST ACT IMMEDIATELY
                                                         MAKE THE CALL