FEAR FACTOR FAITH

I have a great friend who is suffering from a mighty affliction....and it is paralyzing him. Spiritually, emotionally, mentally and physically....Notice how fried and wiped out, bone weary tired you can be....when suddenly your best friend pops in or you win money or something super happens and the fatigue seems to magically vanish? Our minds are powerful little units....we can control a lot more than we generally think....illustrated by the many times we believe we have reached the end of our rope and haven't anything left, we're done in....and suddenly a fire breaks out or we've received sudden great news and our bodies and minds surge! There WAS a bit more fuel in the ol carcass! Pushing ourselves just that wee bit more than we think we are able: Spiritually, emotionally, mentally, physically....these little nudges or outright leaps are absolutely essential for our growth. It is all too easy to stagnate....to feel like it's not worth the bother and to give into the mind numbing lethargy of depression. To get out of that mode, we need to light a motivating fire under ourselves and break out! Fast! Life is short!
I know some people who believe that prayer is merely a placebo or just a catharsis....I can attest to the fact that it is NOT! I'm sure that as we pray, certainly it is cathartic, it soothes to be able to pour forth our hurts, pain, anguish and confess ourselves....however, the healing, guidance and insight come from God's help. There are many days that only through the grace and compassion and greatness of our Heavenly Father am I able to face the day and find any hope or even a reason to drag myself off the bed and begin a new day with an optimistic outlook. I find myself unable to face life without God guiding me and helping me over the rough patches, which are many. I often compare my life with that of other's whose journey is so much more difficult and I am more grateful and appreciative of my own blessings. I know it could always be much worse. Last winter, I read "The Hiding Place" and was awestricken at the faith one woman had for God....I really could not even fathom such selfless dedication and goodness. Faced with nothing but misery and persecution, yet she remained faithful and loyal to God, under conditions that were absolutely deplorable. Not only did she retain her faith, she grew in faith, throughout it all. I wonder how I would have fared....I wonder if  I would fail miserably, perhaps become angry and bitter, wondering  why God would allow such suffering. I must strive daily to remind myself that someday we humans will be spirits....our bodies will no longer remain, so that all that we are must be embodied within our soul, our spirit....no tactile senses, no body to clothe, to enhance, no facade behind which to hide.....then what? WHO will we be? We will become the sum of our parts....our feelings, thoughts, spirituality, all we ARE will be all we become. Scary thought? Really, it is if you believe that God will someday, in the not very far-off-future call us all forth in judgment....and we will all be held accountable for who we have become!
I fear it, yet I welcome the thought of Heaven....To once again meet up with those we had lost to death, perhaps our pets as well....I fantasize about what Heaven will be like. Since I believe that the hereafter will be first lived upon the earth,after we are called forth from the grave by God, (or perhaps some of us will be still living when Jesus comes!!)  I visualize a place where there is no illness, no war, crime, poverty, sadness, misery, fighting, backstabbing.....where unity and peace, love and joy will fill us....where we will be taught how to fully serve God and spend our days doing so....learning, sharing, striving toward that day when we are transformed, our learning complete, brought to fruition and we then assume our spiritual selves! No battle of the sexes, for we will be of no particular sex, as spirits are of no sex....from there, I cannot quite imagine just what we shall undertake....(as spirit beings) but it is really quite mind blowing to try! I read so much about avoiding (at all costs) being deceived by the beast and so I worry about that and wonder how many of us will be lost as a result of that devious deceit. I need to buckle down to reading my Bible, praying for understanding and then I will be baptised. I was baptised as a baby, yet I feel that is not valid, since I believe we must be adults and certain of just what we are undertaking before we are baptised and receive the Gift of the HOLY SPIRIT. I was baptised in a different faith as a baby....a faith that I chose to turn away from as an adult. They were not Sabbath keeping, they observed holidays I feel are pagan and performed and observed ritualistic religion, which I believe is meaningless. To truly pray, one must communicate with God from one's heart....speaking the truth and pouring forth one's soul. In ritualistic religion, one merely utters pre fab prayers and repeats verbatim, words written by another,a hypnotic litany,  that hold little or no meaning for any individual. I can't imagine they mean much to God either. I think we need to speak with reverence and respect and earnestness as we communicate with God....ask Him for faith, strength, hope, guidance and He will help us to grow. Eventually, you will find yourself talking to God more and more throughout the course of the day....and will become closer to Him, learning more about trust in Him. It is so difficult to learn how to leave things in His hands once we have prayed. We must always ask Him for the GIFT of FAITH! I need help with faith every day! The times I have worked hard to help myself and then asked God to guide me through whatever it was, IF I let go and allowed Him to help me, and I followed His path, things worked out perfectly. The times I resisted, things failed. Yet, I still, being human and weak, with a humanoid attitude, require reassurances and ask God for faith daily. I wonder why it is that I still lack in faith, why when God has helped me more times than I know, would I still lack in faith? There were disciples in the Bible days who had that same query...asking God WHY that which they should do, they did not want to do, and that which they should not do, they yearned to do! I attribute some to human nature and some to the devil....we are contrary, we humanoids....always bucking the system, authority, etcetera....selfish, self centered, arrogant. thinking we are adequate to make our own way, but we are not. I certainly must hurry to begin my journey to walk with God....I know I need more changes than can ever be wrought by me in 100 lifetimes but through God's mercy and forgiveness, through Jesus Christ giving His life so that we may be saved, there is still hope! Without that hope....then what???